On today’s episode of “We Could Have Just Been Pet People”… Last night, as I was getting ready to head out to a parent/teacher conference for his big brother, SOMEONE (having decided his father didn’t have nearly enough stress in his life) SHOVED A DAMN LEGO UP HIS NOSTRIL. Not just a little bit up in there, either. DAMN NEAR UP TO THE SEPTUM. Now … Continue reading LEGOS Up The Nose, Or We Could Have Just Been Pet People
“How can you bring children into a world where things like this happen?” Because of them. The heroes who revealed themselves on September 11, 2001. The first responders who ran in headfirst to save those that could be saved. Far too many innocent lives were lost that day. How many more would have been if not for those men and women? I can honestly look … Continue reading The Heroes Our Kids Deserve
What’s the difference between parenting a child with special needs vs. one without? I struggled with that question when my boy was first diagnosed autistic. Him being our first born, I was still just trying to figure out parenting period. What do you do when your child has a condition you can hardly understand or identify with? It took me a long time, too damn … Continue reading The Only Difference
I’m dreaming of a Dad’s Snow Day, With every child’s sleepless night. When my head beats like a piston, and the kids won’t listen, Those buses can still run in the snow. I’m dreaming of a Dad’s Snow day. An empty house would be such a delight. Just one day would make everything better, and my chest feel not so tight. I’m dreaming of a … Continue reading I’m Dreaming of a Dad’s Snow Day
The holiday season is upon us, and with it will come a flurry of Hallmark Channel movies, Rankin Bass specials, and enough bubbly, dancing, carol singing animals to choke a Grinch with. Let’s face it, holiday programming doesn’t exactly skew towards the Dad demographic. Still, if you’re a good boy (and the wife and kids have gone off to sleep), there are still some silver screen gems … Continue reading Dad’s Christmas Watch List
Oh, look at you, you magnificent tool. I don’t even know where to start. Are you drunk in this picture? You have to be drunk. Tell me you’re drunk, ’cause I’m having a hard enough time believing that I’m going to turn out like this. Oh, and one question – WHERE THE HELL IS OUR HAIR?? What on God’s earth possessed you to do that … Continue reading Hey, Old Man!
Parenting can be a thankless job. Sure we get Mother’s and Father’s Days, and every once in a while they’ll make us some little craft or art project out of the blue, but for the most part parenting is a one-way street. We raise them, care for them, provide for them, and they go on about their lives never questioning the golden parachute that is … Continue reading Payback or What I Want From My Kids