Bend It Like Roundbottom

Fun fact:  soccer games for the 3 to 6-year-old league are a lot closer to rugby than European football.  It’s  a swirling mass of little bodies in a desperate contest to take the ball from everyone in the throng, whether they be on the same team or not. Except for my kid.  He’s usually on the other side of the field, trying to chat it up with any females who happen to … Continue reading Bend It Like Roundbottom

Help Wanted

To this day, I can’t believe I got hired for this job. Twice. Working Title:                 Child Development Administrative Partner (aka “Dad”) Position Number:            2 Position Status:                Never-Ending Work Schedule:               On-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year Purpose of Postion: To successfully raise a healthy, self affirmed individual of gender tbd, in an effort to insure self-sufficiency and removal of the grown child from … Continue reading Help Wanted

Advice I Wish I Had Gotten

Well, hello there!  Feeling a little TIRED, are we?  Maybe a little RUN DOWN?  Surely, it couldn’t have ANYTHING to do with that wondrous little miracle that the hospital made you bring home without the courtesy of providing any care instructions!  After all, taking care of a new, incredibly fragile human being can’t possible be any harder than driving, can it?  I mean, you have to have … Continue reading Advice I Wish I Had Gotten

The Grammanati

I’ve noticed something a bit curious about the interactions between my mother and children. Every time Granny Awesome keeps the boys overnight, we always have a quick de-briefing to see when and if she’ll ever watch them again. The response I get is always the same: “Oh, they were sweet little angels. They slept all night, didn’t give me any problems with eating. They were just … Continue reading The Grammanati

Lawyered

  “Here come da judge…here come da judge….” Everyone goes on and on about “the terrible twos”.  Weary parents the world over have bemoaned how terrible life becomes once the small ones move past the “cute, unable to escape you” phase to the point that it has become a cliché.  This might be surprising to hear from the guy constantly going on about the challenges of parenting, … Continue reading Lawyered